I was asked if I will POAS.
I assume she meant "Will you be testing tomorrow?" Because the answer to that is no, no I won't. I'm a sane and rational woman.
Then again, she may have meant, "Will you be testing ever single day from 8DPO until you get your period or see a heartbeat on the ultrasound?"
In which case, well yeah.
I'm a pee-er. I respect the rights of those who aren't. But I am. IF has taught me my version of the Serenity Prayer:
Grant me the patience to wait for the things I must wait for,
The courage to barge head-first into those for which I do not have to wait,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
I understand wanting to feel pregnant for as long as possible. But I don't feel pregnant after transfers. I don't feel pregnant until I get 2 lines.
And the days between my first two lines and my first low beta were the happiest days of my life, including my wedding (sorry JimDear). I don't know that I can recapture that same joy, having watched said joy turn into despair and loss, but I can try.
And if it's negative, which honestly I'm assuming it will be, I can accept that gradually, like I have in the past. And then I can start making plans to switch clinics and sell my body on the streets for a new fresh cycle.
8 comments:
Ah, the great dilemma: to POAS or not to? I usually break around 10 or 11dpo. But it never really feels real then anyway. I support you either way : )
LOL. The irony of selling your body on the streets is that you'd probably wind up getting pregnant. And THIS is how things seem to play out in this life.
Really i am wishing you the best. i 100% percent understand how and why you are guarding your heart and emotions. Im just hoping that you dont have to do it much longer.
I was a pee-er too, I have to have control over something and I figured it was the HPT's. Good luck!
I am team POAS as well.. I don't know how I am going to react to the POAS news from our surro, but I sure am excited to get that far!! Will say a prayer for you for a BFP!
It was me, I asked will you POAS and I met at all? Once, not today, not at 8dpo but once before the beta. I hate the things, I never want to pee on one. They tend to bring me bad news.
I know this post has serious content to it, but I couldn't help to laugh really hard. I love sarcasm :) I am not a pee-er and sometimes I wish I was. Im still here wishing you so much luck, but if its crapppy news let me know what corner you are working and Ill join you :) Seriously, they make good money. ha!
Thinking of you and hoping you see two lines. Love your serenity prayer! I'm so a POASer... I don't feel calm unless I do. I have to know what's up in there! Wishing you the best!
Love the prayer!!
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