I Don't Usually Laugh At Other People's Sex Lives

...especially if those people are patients at my infertility clinic.

But have I mentioned that HIPAA would have a field day at my clinic? Like about the time my husband and I were in the "private office" with the door open, after our first IVF was cancelled, both fighting back tears, all the while listening to a nurse explain all about triggering with Lupron to some high-OHSS-risk girl, and how my husband slammed the door shut (and we kinda got in trouble)? Or how most important information is exchanged at the "nurses station", which is the whole middle of the office area?

I mean, hell, we all suck at having babies, but a little privacy might go a long way.

Which is why I got to hear the absolute most hilarious exchange between my favorite nurse (Nurse H!) and a very new-to-IF (I assume) couple?

SCENE: Nursing station. It's like a big hollow rectangle with computers lining it, and nurses at each computer. Often, patients are talking to the nurses. One such patient, ME, is having a rather dull conversation about her upcoming FET cycle with NURSE C, who isn't actually her nurse at all, but hey, they know her by now, while really just waiting for the RE to sign a form saying I can walk and talk and see and hear, and thus am fit to be a student nurse. (Really, it's the dumbest health report ever, aside from the vaccine parts.) YOUNG COUPLE walks up, approaching the ever-awesome NURSE H.

GUY: (sheepishly clutching brown bag) So where's the...uh...place to go?
NURSE H: Down the hall, on the right.
GUY: (wanders off)
NURSE H: (types at her computer for a minute)
GIRL: Umm...how long is it going to take?
NURSE H: (totally straight-faced, very bland voice) However long it takes him to produce.

Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!

21-ish-year-old girl hastily clarified that she meant to get pregnant (which, BWAHAHAHAHA, oh god, at least 2 years, my dear).

Hand to god, this happened.

Other things that happened: my hormones are good, my lining is only 4mm (which is amazing, since this period has rivaled my miscarriage both in terms of cramps (ok, not quite) and...quantity. I assume I'm on the tail end, although I needed the special training-pad on the table and bled all over the probe), I have a ton of antral follicles, and a small (for me--1.5cm) cyst on my left ovary, which we'll keep an eye on.

Cycle on, baby.