This year, we decided to have an accountant do our taxes. I am (technically, though really, not so much) an independent contractor, so I have to take care of all my own tax stuff. Add that to our medical deductions this year (umm...huge, thank you failed IVFs), and we figured it would be safer, and hopefully audit-avoiding, to pay someone else to sort through it all.
Yesterday (what? I'm only kind of a slacker, there's still almost a month to go), I took all the stuff in and sat down with the CPA. He surprised me by, when I told him our medical expenses and handed over a huge folder of receipts, asking if we'd done IVF.
"Well, yes..." I replied, kind of unsure where this was going. He looked maybe 50ish? And, well, he's a dude.
"What's it run these days?"
"Umm..." Ok, I mean, he does have my receipts in his hands, but I still feel totally, totally awkward talking about money. God, the fact that we spent all our savings on this is private!
"Because when my wife and I did it, 7 years ago, it was like 10 grand a pop. Took us four times to get our little girl."
Well holy shit! We then proceeded to have a huge conversation about it. He went to the other clinic in town, but one of our doctors was the same (Dr. H...my clinic poached him). He and his wife never had any frozen embryos, and he thinks its awesome that we did and that that's how I'm pregnant. (Oh come on, like you wouldn't have shared.) He asked me if my hips were killing me, and then told me his wife still has some intramuscular welts. Oh dear. He wanted to go back for more kids, but his wife didn't agree, and now he takes his daughter mini-golfing and such.
Despite the fact that he used "implanted" for "transferred", it was an incredibly conversation. Outside of my clinic and the internet, he's the first person who's ever discussed his IVF with me. It was very random, and also...it felt really good.
I've been very worried this past week. My symptoms are still present, but...well, the notion of me having a baby with an actual heartbeat is hard to grasp. I so hope it happens, but I'm terrified it won't.
Seeing the pictures of his little girl gave me (as lame as it sounds) a bit of hope. And it sure made doing my taxes a heck of a lot more pleasant.
11 comments:
That is awesome!! And i bet he is going to work it out superbly to get you some killer tax breaks. Those medical expenses are surely going to help. We got a break for medical expenses. (the dude had a PE and wracked up big bills)
I hope you get a refund(if they even still give those out) and can use it for baby stuff!!
(((hugs)))
Isn't it amazing the people you run into that have done IVF?
Maybe having gone through it he's got a well primed infertile-dar that picked you out even before you bought out the bills. Sounds like he's a nice guy and now you can be sure he'll do his best to make sure you get every bit of rebate you're entitled to.
Here from ICLW - what a great experience! I found that once I was pregnant (and even more so once my son was born), it became sooo much easier to talk about infertility. And once you start talking, you find it more places than you'd think.
I love moments like that : )
Ummmm totally a "sign" meeting that guy and sharing your stories :) A good sign :)
Hi there. Dropping in from ICLW. You really do end up finding people who have dealt with infertility in all different places. For me it was a dental hygienist. I do wish more people would talk about it! Good luck with your pregnancy. I can't wait to hear more about your progress!
With any luck this means he will do an extra good job at your tax return and organise you guys some tax back to pay towards all teh awesome stuff your baby will need. Looking forward to hearing about that heart beat!
I haven't really met anyone else to talk about infertility with either, just one of the mom's of a child I see for speech therapy (I work in early intervention). That is pretty funny how he approached it, but sounds like it was a good conversation that gave you some hope.
Good luck with your pregnancy. Happy ICLW from #64
I guess it just goes to show that anybody can suffer from infertility, and you never know who you might run in to who has gone through or is going through the same thing!
Congratulations!
That's the thing about IF - once you start sharing your story, it's amazing how many of the people around us have been affected by it as well. Sounds like a great appointment!
ICLW#151
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